Decluttering our relationship.
An unhappy relationship could make the person miserable. I grew up in a culture, believing that self sacrificing was a very noble thing to do and we should always think about others first. Thinking about myself first, was considered very selfish. But yet when it got to finances and survival, being first was the only thing in everybody's mind.
Years later, I chose to have a different mind set since I was not too found of my old ways of thinking.
Now , I do my best to respect every body and do not hurry to get material goods first. but when it comes to myself, I learned to respect myself more. It is not about being selfish. It is about valuing the most important person in your life. Yourself. I know , it still might sound selfish, but without yourself being healthy and happy, can you be a good parent? Can you be a good life partner? Can you be a good friend?
I am not talking about being self centered. I am talking about being happy and healthy, respecting and loving yourself.
When you love and respect yourself, you will not tolerate destructive relationships.
Here are some tips about how how to start decluttering your relationships.
- Stop judging people around you: before you start decluttering your relationship, you need to stop being so judgmental and start respecting and caring for people, just the way they are. Remember, you can not change and should not try to change anybody. If your expectations are too high, adjust it. You want to be loved just the way you are too. Aren't you?. Choose wisely who you need to declutter from your life. After all, you don't want to loose a wonderful friend over minor details.
- Stay away from people that make you simply unhappy. Unhappiness is contagious. When you surround yourself with unhappy people, no matter how much you love them, you become unhappy. Some people make you unhappy because they are miserable and all they want and need to talk about is how unhappy they are. In other words nag about it. You never hear from them anything good. Some people make you unhappy by criticizing you all the time. They don't even know it, but hey can make you feel pretty down.
- Reduce your relationship with the family members that harm you emotionally. Try to limit your relationship from that loving family member that is criticizing your every move. the one that brings back your bad memories, treat you like you don't matter or always takes, but never gives. Some times the love just can go wrong and make us miserable. Don't forget, you can choose your friends, but you can not choose your family members. There is nothing wrong with choosing to keep a distance just to find your own happiness. There is no need to sacrifice yourself for the sake of just being a family member. Of course you love them, but it does not mean that you have to hang out with them with the price of being unhappy. You live only once.
- Surround yourself with happy people. Happiness is the ultimate goal for all of us. Happy people change your mood right away. People that smile all the time and are happy and pleasant make you love your life and enjoy their company. Happiness is one of the most beautiful emotions in life.
- Surround yourself with positive people. Positive people see the glass half full. They see the best in each situation. They are full of gratitude and appreciation. One thing that makes you happy is to appreciate what you have and be grateful. Positive people are a delight to hang out with.
- Find people in the same mindset and interest. Hang out with people that you have more in common. The more you have in common , the more your will enjoy their company . You can also be a good company for people that you have more in common. Sharing a hobby or a topic can be healing and take your loneliness away.
- Surround yourself with successful people. Just like many other things, success is contagious as well. When you are hanging out with successful people, you see the happiness, the energy, the positiveness , the power in them. Before you know it, you start feeling energetic and powerful. You start aiming for higher and you will feel much better. They also can help tremendously when you need a brain storming help.
- Be a good friend. Before you start eliminating people from your life, make sure you have been a good friend. Some times people are sour, because of the way you treat them. Are you overly critical? Are you an opinionated person. Are you the one that never listens? Think twice before judging.
Love yourself
Respect yourself
Value yourself
Take care of yourself
Be good to yourself
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